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Post by Deleted on Dec 17, 2009 11:00:22 GMT -6
The Tiger Woods jokes are flying around madly. I heard a pretty funny one the other day. "What's the difference between Tiger and Santa? Santa stops at 3 Ho's."  |
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Post by Deleted on Dec 17, 2009 18:42:34 GMT -6
The police asked Tiger's wife how many times she hit him. "I can't remember," she said, "just put me down for a 5." LOL
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Post by Mike(FWF P1MPS) on Dec 18, 2009 6:18:23 GMT -6
Tiger changed his Nike slogan from JUST DO IT......to JUST DID HER!!!! it had him after he makes his full driver swing with a smile on his face, while a hot female golfer is bent over in front of him reading her putt....
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Post by Rob (MN M357's) on Dec 18, 2009 11:24:10 GMT -6
Whats black and comes in a white box?
Tiger Woods.
Perhaps Tiger should be using a driver?
This is the first time Tiger's ever failed to drive 300 yards
After a wayward drive, Tiger Woods found water before nestling behind a tree
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Post by Bill (Fog City Force) on Dec 18, 2009 11:34:50 GMT -6
"Tiger and Elin have signed a new prenuptual agreement. According to the new contract, the next time Tiger plays a round, Elin will hand him his balls."
"What do Barack Obama and Tigers Woods have in common?
They've both made a billion dollars, neither one keeps their promises and they both will only screw white people."
"Don't you think it's suspicious that all of the sudden Phil Michelson thinks it's a great idea to install fire hydrants on all major golf courses?"
"when asked how the recent car accident/beat down had affected his playing ability, tiger said, "well, my long game is still pretty good. i just need to focus on getting my putz down."
"What’s the difference between a car and a golf ball? Tiger can drive a ball 400 yards."
"Ping just offered Elin Woods an endorsement contract pushing her own set of drivers. They are said to be named Elin Woods…”clubs you can beat Tiger with.”
"What do you buy a Tiger for Christmas?…A new windshield!"
"Tiger crashed his car because he was in a rush to move on to the next hole."
"Tiger uses clubs to hit golf balls while his wife uses clubs to hit tigers balls."
"Just because you’re the world’s no. 1 golfer, it doesn’t mean you can’t be beaten by your wife."
"What were Tiger Woods and his wife doing out at 2.30 in the morning? They went clubbing."
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Post by Deleted on Dec 18, 2009 13:16:47 GMT -6
I guess you heard them all, Bill. Good God!
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Post by Bill (Fog City Force) on Dec 18, 2009 13:29:00 GMT -6
The Real Estate Development world is pretty damn slow these days........
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Post by Deleted on Dec 18, 2009 22:47:18 GMT -6
- Did you hear Tiger changed his name to Cheetah?
-What does Tiger Woods have in common with a baby seal? They've both been clubbed by a Norwegian. ( I know she is Swedish... its still funny as shit)
-Tiger has a new movie coming out. It's called Crouching Tiger, Hidden Hydrant.
-What's the difference between Tiger Woods' house and his Escalade?
The white airbag in the Escalade didn't blow up and hit him in the face.
-What were Tiger Woods & his wife doing out at 3am?
Clubbing
-Tigers Attorneys issued the following statement: "Mr. Woods would like to take a mulligan."
-Tiger is just trying to be the craziest whitest black man on the planet now that Michael is dead
-Tiger's putting alright but his driving sucks.
- Elin finally did what Phil Mickelson never could, beat him with a nine iron...
-Did you hear Tiger went Christmas Caroling? He sang "All I Want for Christmas is my Two Front Teeth"
-Tiger Woods average score - 69!
-Tiger Woods has a new sponsor – Motel 6.
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Post by Mike(FWF P1MPS) on Dec 19, 2009 8:16:03 GMT -6
It is near the Christmas break of the school year. The students have
turned in all their work and there is really nothing more to do. All the
children are restless and the teacher decides to have an early
dismissal.
Teacher: "Whoever answers the questions I ask, first and correctly can
leave early today."
Little Johnny says to himself "Good, I want to get outta here. I'm smart
and will answer the question."
Teacher: "Who said 'Four Score and Seven Years Ago'?"
Before Johnny can open his mouth, Susie says, "Abraham Lincoln."
Teacher: "That's right Susie, you can go home."
Johnny is mad that Susie answered the question first.
Teacher: "Who said 'I Have a Dream'?"
Before Johnny can open his mouth, Mary says, "Martin Luther King."
Teacher: "That's right Mary, you can go."
Johnny is even madder than before.
Teacher: "Who said 'Ask not, what your country can do for you'?"
Before Johnny can open his mouth, Nancy says, "John F. Kennedy."
Teacher: "That's right Nancy, you may also leave."
Johnny is boiling mad that he has not been able to answer to any of the
questions.
When the teacher turns her back Johnny says, "I wish these bitches would
keep their mouths shut!"
The teacher turns around: "NOW WHO SAID THAT?"
Johnny: "TIGER WOODS. CAN I GO NOW?
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Post by ludloca on Dec 23, 2009 15:45:28 GMT -6
Merry Christmas for the Woods family ;D Attachments:
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Post by Gregg(Seal Fuckers) on Dec 23, 2009 19:40:12 GMT -6
Merry Christmas for the Woods family ;D well hello chuck |
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Post by Gregg(Seal Fuckers) on Dec 23, 2009 22:08:09 GMT -6
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Post by Bill (Fog City Force) on Dec 28, 2009 21:09:07 GMT -6
Merry Christmas for the Woods family ;D Nice! |
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